Home Invaders

Nothing ruins the quiet serenity of small town suburbia then the consistent droning of HOME INVADERS.

To our must utmost dismay our home has now become a dwelling for winged spawn of Satan!

Imagine for a moment will you? Your pulling on your garden gloves, pushing the good ole lawn cutter and are coasting along to a perfectly cut lawn. When all of a sudden, the skies turn gray, and a ominous cloud surrounds you, Pain ripples through a section of your back. You spin searching for the source when POW!!! your hit in the neck, then the leg, then the thigh. You run, but there is no escape, your hit two more time in the buttocks. You trip over a lawn gnome and get tangled in the garden hose, Oh Jesus your disabled and vulnerable. Then...then you look into the face of your attacker! He's small, beady eyed and stripped. a wasp...no not A wasp, a HORDE of wasps...your a goner.

OK OK, so this is a dramatization of actual events, names and dates have been changed to protect the innocent...or something like that

But needless to say we have had some unwanted visitors.

I unfornatly got to meet these "special guests" today.

As I came home from work and innocently was walking toward the front door. I was so close to the "safe zone" when all of sudden I noticed something flying around me, actually two somethings, wait...no three...WTF, i was being swarmed. All of a sudden my conversation with my mother about the wasps came rushing back to me. My fight or flight instinct instantly kicked in. (I am not much of a fighter, Im a lover actually...wink wink....) and I sprinted for the door, In my blind terror I was none to graceful in my escape.

I scrambled for the door and in the process got my foot caught,, I fell through the front door, with skin missing from my shin and fell over my toy poodle....

It wasnt a pretty sight and im pretty sure my shin looks like lunch meat...yea I have braved to look at it.

After this evenings "festivities" I am 110% sure that bugs are on a mission to take out the human race one bumbling idiot at a time.

What these winged hellions arent aware of is that they will soon be homeless and possible wingless when I am done, AHHAHAHAHHHAHAHHHEHEHHEHEHAHHHAHHAHA....