Today has been......a hard day, just putting it lightly. It has been just a really hard, stressful, emotionally draining day.While sitting at work taking mentally straining phone calls, trying to remember how surgical procedures are covered and trying to figure out if Dr. Jones is a network provider, my mind was miles away. My mind was many, many miles away with my father. Today my daddy was having a surgery, today my father laid on table, while under anesthesia being medically altered by a doctor. During this time there was the ever present possibility that he may never wake up...though small the possibility was, it was possible.
My mind could not let go of that one simple fact, that in one simple instance there could have been a possibility I would never see my father again. Just typing this makes me tear up.
It was too much of a reality that life really truly could change in one little moment.
If anyone knows me and my fathers relationship, its quirky and strange but in the end it works for us. I love my father more that anyone in this world, he has always been there for me, always that consistent figure in my life. Through all the best moments of my life, my daddy has been there. The thought that he may not be there (or live forever, cause he will) fills me with a dread I cant quite explain.
My father is now home recovering and likely to make a full recovery, but the fact remains that eventually at some point in time I will have to face the moment when my dad may get sick or old or sick and old....whatever it maybe, it may be something he will not recover from and Daddy's little girl will have to stand by and watch..that helpless moment.
Until that moment comes, Ill enjoy having my dad every moment I can, making fun of his silly ways and arguing with his ridiculous ideas...Because in reality I wouldn't trade my father for anyone else in the world.
~*Much Love my Bloggers*~
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